What Do You Want To Be Known For?

What Do You Want To Be Known For?

Many years ago (23 to be exact) I was living in the city and I met these Irish kids who moved in across the street from me for the summer.

Eighteen of them moved into a 3 bedroom apartment! It was close quarters obviously but they all got along. They were loving and kind to each other. They were always checking in and supporting each other. They had a sense of compassion that I had never seen before.

I fell in love with each and every one of them. I liked them. I liked the way they lived their lives. I liked the way they lead with their hearts.

I hired many of them to work for me and helped others find jobs. My brother and I gave them extra furniture and pots and pans that we didn’t need. They became like family. Every year for about 5 years they would send more Irish over to us and I would hire them, help them find apartments, and take care of them like they were my own kids.

They made me a better person by being such good people.

I was reflecting recently after one of the Irish girls was in town with her Mom about why that time in my life was so special. I think they helped me to shape the person I wanted to become and through their kindness I was even more kind. Through their love I was more loving. Through their compassion I was more compassionate and through their grace I learned grace. They were the best friends I’ve ever known. They taught me friendship on another level that most Americans don’t ever get to experience.

Last night I was watching the last episode of a show I LOVED called Better Things and the daughter said this to the Mom.

“You’re nice. You’re a good person. You make people feel comfortable. You help people. I like you. I like the way you live your life.”

And I cried.

That’s what I want to be known for: for being nice, for being a good person, for making people feel good, for helping and for living my life true to those values.

What do you want to be known for? #soulhappy

How I Apply the Magic Formula of Determination + Accountability

How I Apply the Magic Formula of Determination + Accountability

Today’s situation… I had workout clothes on since 7 am, trying desperately to squeeze in a workout ALL day. I reached out to 15-20 (literally) babysitters to watch the kids so John and I could go out to dinner. I juggled work, play, kids, dog, lunch, parks, cousins, sugar highs, tired kids, etc. At one point I couldn’t  remember the last time I ate.  This is a VERY typical Saturday. Or any day. 

One thing I’ve learned in my journey of personal growth and expansion is… 

Determination + Accountability = Magic formula 

With determination I can get my workouts in. I am ALWAYS ALWAYS finding ways to hold myself accountable or have others hold me accountable. In this case I have an accountability group that I told I would workout hard 5 times this week. So now I HAVE to workout today. I already missed one day. Tomorrow is no guarantee. I need the drive and I need the accountability. So I squeezed in a workout: 25 minutes of running, jump squats and push-ups while running an errand. Perfection. 

AND….

I found a sitter on attempt number 21 about an hour before our dinner reservation. 

I. Was. Determined. And I was held accountable by that same group. I told them I would plan a fun date night by the end of the week.  I feel Iike these 2 things in combination are highly underrated.  I could have given up on sitter request number 8 or when dinner plans were only 2 hours away but I didn’t.  I kept texting John and our friends that I was “getting closer”. 

Listen, I want to be held accountable for things that will move my life forward. I’ve danced around going on weekly date nights for years. I said I wanted to but didn’t do it. I tried for a while but then let stuff with the kids get in the way. But I know all too well how much it enhances our relationship. 

So excuses be gone.  I want YOU to hold me accountable for a weekly date night. And we can all witness as my relationship improves. Who’s with me? Want in?

Determination + Accountability = Magic

How Your Mindset Determines Your Success

How Your Mindset Determines Your Success

Mastering your MINDSET is the most overlooked aspect of health, fitness, relationships, abundance, AND happiness.  And, it’s the most important if you want SUSTAINABLE success in any of these areas. Most experts fly right past mindset and start with ACTION. (You know, the “how to” strategies, tips and tactics.) They push action and try and force results.  

That’s all well and good, but… It doesn’t work.  Here’s why… 

You have to put your STATE and your STORY (or mindset) first. 

Here’s an example.  You can have the perfect seed, and have the best strategies and follow all the best advice and instructions to grow that seed.  You can water it and get it out in the sun  taking all the ACTION necessary to grow that seed.  BUT, if you plant that seed in the wrong foundation, if you plant it in cement, or in clay, it doesn’t matter what you DO it will never grow and flourish.  So, we have to ensure the soil (or mindset) is a fertile environment for the seed to grow and flourish.

 

This principle gets missed too often, and that’s why success is short-lived at best. To change our habits and behaviors, we’re constantly told to:

Do more 

Force change 

Hustle 

Push past our fears 

Overcome obstacles 

Move outside our comfort zone 

 

These are all ACTIONS we’re instructed to take.

 

But, here’s what happens:

If you don’t address your underlying perceptions, beliefs, and expectations about those (or any) behaviors…

… simply performing the action will NOT lead to sustained success.

 

A few EXAMPLES will help illustrate this point. (These all represent actions, behaviors, and habits that you’re probably familiar with):

– Health: You lose weight by exercising and eating healthy (action). You don’t sustain the weight loss (because you haven’t addressed the beliefs you have around your self worth.  

 

– Career, Finances: You make a lot of money by working, saving, and investing (action). You don’t sustain it, and lose it because you haven’t changed your abundance mindset.  

 

– Relationships: People get out of a toxic relationship, then jump right back into another one. They haven’t changed their unconscious limiting beliefs. 

 

You try to modify behaviors, but ultimately, it’s not changing the end result. You MIGHT see short-term improvement… but not sustainable long-term health, wealth, happiness, or success.  The TAKE-HOME POINT? 

 

You, me, and everyone has old patterns and habits, unconscious stories, narratives, limiting beliefs and thoughts that DRIVE our conscious actions, habits, and behaviors. 

 

We think we’re creating behavior changes through conscious action… BUT, the UNCONSCIOUS DRIVES THE ACTION. Our beliefs whether positive or negative will always create our reality.  

 

We will continue falling back into our old behaviors and habits unless we change and upgrade these unconscious beliefs.  

 

Sustainable change in your health and life means fixing the driver of the action and behavior.

 

Now, how can you do that? See the P.S. below…

 

PS If you’re ready for a NEXT LEVEL mastermind I’m starting a very small intimate group soon with the most access to me of any of my programs or masterminds. If this sounds like something you need, apply here.