Your Next Level/NEW Normal….

Your Next Level/NEW Normal….

Two Years ago I taught a course at Mindvalley University in Barcelona, Spain.  It was an incredible experience.  But there was one problem. I had my own coaching business but I was teaching someone else’s program.  And I was good at it.  I was great at it.  AND I was traveling around the world teaching it WHILE doing my own coaching.  Win.  Win.  Right? 

No.  Not right. 

I was teaching someone else’s program.  Not my own. 

I felt it.  And kept feeling it.  That pull that comes from your heart when you’re ready for more, when your soul is whispering.  Will you listen? 

I’ve heard this before…. over and over I’ve heard it.  Sometimes I listened.  Sometimes I didn’t. I only regretted the times I didn’t listen. 

And so I leapt. 

The next time I was asked to teach that program….I said no.  Even though it was good money.  Even though it was an amazing opportunity.  Even though it was a very enticing destination. 

Because here’s the thing, I didn’t want to be known for teaching THAT program.  I wanted to be known for teaching my own. 

So I had to leap.  It really wasn’t an option.  The cocoon was breaking apart.  It couldn’t hold me back any longer. 

The transformation isn’t easy.  It’s definitely a metamorphosis.  And there’s lots to learn.  But I’m happy to report that just 2 years later all my dreams are now my new normal. 

The programs I wanted to run.  The courses I wanted to design.  The masterminds.  The luxury retreats.  The team.  The platform.  The list.  The book.  The speaking gigs.  All of it. 

And then I got the call…. I was asked to speak at Mindvalley University again.  But this time doing my own thing.  Teaching my own workshop. 

And let me tell you…. It.  Was.  Spectacular!  It was everything I dreamed of and more. 

I stood at the front of the room at the end of my talk, with people applauding and a standing ovation.  They came up to meet me and give me a hug and asked me to sign my book.  It was a dream.  It was surreal.  And it was everything I had pictured and more.  

And… it felt so normal.  It was easy.  Almost effortless.  It felt right.  I felt like I belonged up there.  The praise and accolades felt normal.  The book signing felt normal.  The standing O felt normal. 

This quickly became my new normal. 

And it can for you too.  When you get sick and tired of doing for others and you’re ready, really ready to step up and do for yourself.  It can be your new normal when you’re finally ready to leap.  It might not mean to quit your job and start your own thing but you know what the leap is.  It might be a leap into your health and fitness, a leap into your relationship or a leap into investing in yourself and your self care.  But there’s a leap.  How do I know?  Because it’s life.  And we’re made for this. 

Are you ready to leap?  Are you ready for your new normal? 

I’d love to hear what it is. 

Take the first step and post your leap here. This tribe knows how to support the caterpillars. 

Soon to be butterflies, 

Steffani 

I’ve been struggling

I’ve been struggling

I’ve been struggling.  I’ve been struggling with letting go.  I’ve been struggling with over thinking.  I’ve been. struggling with doing too much and getting nowhere.  I’ve been struggling with trying too hard.  With forcing.  With over controlling.   With trying to control the world actually.  With trying to control other peoples worlds too.  I’ve been struggling. 

Can you relate?  

This is a regular occurrence for me.  It’s cyclical.  I struggle.  I keep struggling. I try fighting it.  I try pushing it away.  I struggle more.  And then I break down.   I crash and burn.  I get sick or overwhelmed and I give up.  I throw my hands in the air.   I drop down to my knees (literally) and I surrender.  I let go and let God.  

And undoubtedly here’s what happens….   It all gets easier.   

Just like that things start getting better.  It’s like a slingshot.  Like I’ve been pulled back so far there’s only one way up and out and the second I let go I get catapulted forward. 

 I don’t struggle as often as I used to.  It happens less and less frequently and I catch it sooner these days.   The minute I catch it I have an array of things I can do to instantly let go.   

Here’s the short list: 

  • Sing
  • Dance 
  • Laugh
  • Do a cartwheel
  • Call a friend 
  • Listen to a podcast
  • Find an inspiring video  
  • Brew a cup of coffee
  • Sing some more 
  • Shout at the top of my lungs “I LOVE MY LIFE” 
  • Pet my dog 
  • Pet my husband 
  • Do dishes (Kidding…  I hate doing dishes!) 
  • Take a bath
  • Hug a tree
  • Feel the sunshine on my face
  • Pray 
  • Meditate 
  • Take a long hot steam shower
  • Take a walk in nature 

And use this mantra:

It’s my time.  Align.  Align. Align.  I release the how.  Allow.  Allow. Allow.

The truth is everything we want is achievable when we let go.  It’s the way we allow in all our desires.  We’re just stuck in the illusion of lack and fear and the hustle.  We’re stuck believing that the harder we paddle upstream that we’ll get downstream.  Life doesn’t work that way.  The minute we let go of the oars our boat turns and we allow our  dreams in.  

Are you struggling in any area of life?  

What can you do to let go?  

I Broke Down In Tears

I Broke Down In Tears

Yesterday I broke down in tears. It was a long day with the kids. Zoe got mad and threw something that hit me in the face. That’s what triggered it but not why I cried. I cried because I fell into an old pattern. An old story that used to creep up on me all the time. That story is…”it’s really hard to parent my kids.” 

And here’s all the evidence I’ve built up behind that story:

They’re explosive. 

They fight a lot. 

They have a hard time in school. 

They never stop moving. Or taking. Or whining. 

They are very needy. 

And just exhausting. 

That story took over as I cried in my room. With a lot of self defeating thoughts. 

“This is too hard.”

“I’m not good at this.”

“They’re so hard to parent.”

“Why can’t this be easier?” 

“I’m a terrible mom!”

These feelings swept over me. But not for long. I’ve been doing this work for too long to let this old pattern reemerge. I know not to believe and buy into the thoughts that don’t serve me. I can use them as fuel to make positive change. In this instance to create some boundaries with Zoe around how she treats people. But I can’t let stressful thoughts spiral out of control. Or they’ll start to define me. They’ll define us. 

“It’s the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”

Aristotle was right. When we know how to let the thoughts that don’t serve us pass us by we can find more peace and love the people closest to us. 

This is powerful work we’re up to. Feel it. Honor it. But then don’t believe it. Choose the thoughts that empower you and support your growth. They’re always available. 

Believe in yourself, but not in your thoughts.  I believe in you,