How To Prepare Your Kids While You’re Away (Tips for Overcoming Mom Guilt)

How To Prepare Your Kids While You’re Away (Tips for Overcoming Mom Guilt)

I’m an advocate of Moms traveling solo. I travel for work often. Next week I’m leaving for Pula, Croatia to speak at Mindvalley University.  A dream I 

launched 2 years ago that is now coming true. This year I’m bringing my son. It will be his first trip overseas and our first trip just the 2 of us.  I know many Moms struggle with leaving their kids. I have found a WONDERFUL way to prepare the kids, and our whole family whenever I leave. (Tips on Mommy guilt coming later…)

Here are some of the tools I’ve used that have made traveling a LOT easier.

First and foremost spend LOTS of one on one time with them before you leave. Need I say more?  If you’re a parent you get it.

I buy a dollar store gift for every day I’m gone.  It helps them get excited to get out of bed and my husband has really easy mornings with them when they have this to look forward to and keep them busy.  They usually contain simple games, or an easy dot to dot coloring book or painting project.  They love them.  Quick warning…husbands don’t like Silly String 🙂

In a jar with a label, I leave 1 kiss for each kid for each day that I’m away.  This way when there are only a few left they know I’ll be home soon.  And they know I’m thinking of them and this is my “KISS”.

I can’t leave without a detailed spreadsheet for everyone who will be helping out.  It includes their daily schedule, their morning, afterschool and evening routines.  Everyone and anyone’s phone numbers, including friends parents for play dates.  All of their activities are on there.  Who’s picking up who when.  AND their logins for certain apps or websites they might use.  Like ABC Mouse or Lexia Core.

spreadsheet

I can’t forget about my first love. 🙂  I leave daily cards or notes for my husband so he knows how grateful I am for him while he’s doing extra duties around the house and with the kids.  I’ve left little notes in our shower or bathroom and full handwritten cards and letters.  Sometimes I ask the kids to give them to him once I’m gone in a nice box so they have that to look forward to the day I leave.

I always ask my kids to give me one of their “lovies” or stuffed animals while I travel.  So I can take photos of where I am and show them what I’m up to.  They know that I snuggle these lovies at night and think about them all the time.  These lovies have more fun then the average person.  🙂  One time they were dancing on stage in front of hundreds of people.  The kids LOVED it.

 

Once I started doing all of this when I went out of town it was a LOT easier to leave.  My kids don’t whine about it.  They actually look forward to it. 🙂

I always return with a present or a treat.  And even if they miss me while I’m gone they have a lot of reinforcement that I’m thinking of them and that I’ll be back soon.

Will my kids be ok while I’m away?

The answer is HELL YES they will.

Now for those Moms who are longing to travel but still feel their kids will not be ok without them.  I can tell you from experience it has HELPED my kids.  They realize that they don’t need me for everything. They’re more self-reliant when I’m gone.  I feel it’s ok for kids to miss someone.  It doesn’t break them like we fear.  They’re stronger than we know.  A few days away is just a blip on the radar in their long and beautiful lives.  It’s important for me to teach my kids how to handle challenging situations. How to get by and manage the day without me over their shoulder.  And it teaches them how to have reverence for something, to be grateful when something returns, with gifts. 🙂  When I travel alone it helps them learn all of that.   It has really enhanced our lives.   I hope this enhances yours.

Loving this life and travel,

Steffani

Day 3 – The Belief Challenge

Day 3 – The Belief Challenge

Believe that Nothing is Too Good to be True

Cultivate big dreams.  Believe wholeheartedly that those big dreams will come true.

Our human nature compels us to tend to focus on what hasn’t come true – what is lacking. It’s just where our mind goes. Consider for a moment the MANY things we now have or have done that were once only a dream.

We need to focus more on those.

Life is full of wonder. And awe. And Miracles.

We only have to allow ourselves to see it.

Nothing is impossible. Nothing is too good to be true. Life is full of fairytales.

Look for them. They’re everywhere.

Today I was SUPERMOM!

Today I was SUPERMOM!

My Super Power is – Being a Mom!

Today I had some play dates and ran errands with them. I got dinner on the table and watched a fun movie, had a tickle fest, and rode bikes to get ice cream.

And… I yelled at them. (Like screamed my head off) And sent them to their rooms. Together and separately … and said “oh my fucking God” under my breath about 50 times in just a few hours.

You see this is what it’s like to be a parent … and I don’t care if you judge me!

No, I’m not proud of it. And yes I’m always striving to do better. But I also know how NORMAL it is.  I get that we’re ashamed of it. But raising kids is not easy. If you can do it without raising your voice or flying off the handle you need to write a book, raise my children and become President of the world.

Because, seriously, that’s nearly impossible.

If you’re raising young kids. Especially if they’re as active and explosive and bold and fearless as mine, and you yell sometimes … I want you to know, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! and on top of that, you’re doing a DAMN GOOD JOB!

Are the kids alive? Are you alive? Great job momma! Seriously. We’re way too hard on ourselves.

I find a lot of relief in finding the balance between accepting myself, forgiving myself and striving to do better. I’m ok with that, and so far so are my kids.

So maybe we can be not proud but also not ashamed. And maybe we can cheer each other on when we’re super moms. Maybe we can teach our kids in the process how to radically accept themselves and that shit’s gonna hit the fan sometimes and how to move through it and laugh and forgive and go out for ice cream.

What I do know is every day is a new day. And every day we are here is precious. No regrets!

Can you relate mommas?

To connect with me and other like-minded moms, join us in the Badass Mom Society on Facebook.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/badassmomsociety/