How You FEEL Matters.

How You FEEL Matters.

How Feelings Manifest Our Reality

We manifest our reality not just from our thoughts – (Sooo sooo important), not just from our words – (Equally as important).  But also from our feelings. In fact, I think how we FEEL is the most important of all.

It’s the feeling that we’re after anyway right?

We all want to FEEL better.  We want more inner peace. We want more joy. We want more happiness and contentment.  We don’t want the stress and the drama. We don’t want the hustle.

What we’re after is what the hustle brings. It brings freedom and ease. But only if we let it, and we let it by feeling first.

You see, it’s not when you have it all that you’ll finally be HAPPY, it’s when you’re HAPPY that you’ll actually have it all.

Our feelings matter. 

Now I know what you’re thinking… here come the “yea buts”…

“Yea but my husband is so negative”

“Yea but my job sucks”

“Yea but I don’t have any money or time or support”

All those “Yea buts” place an order.

When you think that and focus on that and FEEL that you’ll get more of it.

You need a clean slate.

You need to start FEELING how you want to feel. And you need to feel it now. Time is running out.

Don’t wait another minute to feel better. You have to start today.

What can you do today to FEEL better?

If you need support, join me in the Badass Mom Society. This is what I do. I’ve got this mastered.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/badassmomsociety/

 

How to recover from an EPIC mom fail …

How to recover from an EPIC mom fail …

Hello friends,

Recently I booked a special trip with my 8 year old son Jack.  We were going to Cancun, Mexico to meet up with friends of mine and help on a service trip.  We were spending 3 days helping to support a Dad with 3 boys and rebuild their house and their lives.

We were SO excited.  Jack was excited to finally join me on some of my favorite work.  And I was excited for Jack to meet some of the most inspiring people in my life and some of my favorite friends.  For him to be in that energy was a dream come true for me.

I woke up at 5 am, bags were packed, grabbed our passports and O! M! G!   My sons passport was expired!!!!!!

Holy SHIT!

Worst Mom EVER.
Worst day EVER.

Have you ever had one of those epic mom fails?  Probably not as big as this one.  This makes missing Zoe’s first recital because you got the day wrong look like peanuts.  Or leaving the hockey equipment at home when you arrive at an away game look like a slight oversight.  Totally forgivable.

This. THIS was a fail of EPIC proportion.

At first I was just going to stay home with him.  Forget the trip all together. How could I possibly go WITHOUT him?  This was planned for US, not just me.  But I was bringing important equipment down for the experience.  More people shouldn’t have to suffer from my fail.

As the reality of the situation hit me I started to shut down.  I went to the airport, found the nearest bathroom and wept.

Why is this happening?
Did I make the right decision?
How could I let this happen?
Will he ever forgive me?
Will my husband ever forgive me?
How can I recover from this?

I wiped my tears, settled down on my flight and made a plan.

Here’s how I chose to recover from this EPIC Mom Fail:

#1.  Stay in the present moment. 
Thinking about what SHOULD have been or could have been was not healthy.  I had to try and stay in the present moment.

#2. Close your eyes and forgive. 
Beating myself up about it wouldn’t help anyone.  It would only make me frustrated, upset and irritable.

#3. Let it go and TRUST the Universe has a bigger plan. 
Elsa is a genius.  When I let it go I started to see why this was meant to be.  As the days unfolded I realized how much more I could do with Jack not there.  It didn’t make up for the missed experience with him but it did profoundly impact these boys lives in a much bigger way than I could have with Jack along.

#4. Safeguard your happiness.
When I first arrived, even with this plan, I was sulking.  All I could do was look around and think about how much better it would be with Jack there.  How much fun he would have.  How it would impact him.  I had to shake it off and do things to bring myself joy.  A walk on the beach.  Morning yoga.  Laughing with friends.  A margarita the size of my head.  Whatever it takes.  Focus on your happiness because it’s your JOB and your job only.  No one else will.

#5.  Make a new plan. 
I talked with Jack and asked him “what can I do to make this up to you?”  We had an overnight in the city, he got a hamster (ewwww, major sacrifice) and there was a visit to Chuckie Cheese (even bigger sacrifice!!!!)  Jack forgave me.  And we’re excited to plan another trip to go on together.

I hope you don’t ever have a Mom fail of epic proportion.  But if you do follow these steps and you’ll hopefully get on the other side of it a little faster.

Share with me, what was YOUR epic Mom fail? Because we’re all in this together and I could use the camaraderie. 🙂

Loving this life, fails and all,
Steffani

I Cry Everyday

I Cry Everyday

I cry every day….

People who know me will not be surprised to read this. 

But I honestly cry EVERY DAY. 

I don’t cry out of sadness or anger or upset.  Sure I have as many challenges as anyone else in this life.  I have stresses and frustrations and family members who are ill.  But still, that’s not why I cry.

Every day I cry for a different reason. 

I used to feel ashamed of my tears.  My deep emotions.  I wanted to be less emotional.  I used to work at controlling my emotions and tried hard for years to keep my tears in check. 

Until one day a woman in a workshop who sat along side me took my face in her hands when my eyes filled with tears and said “I wish I could FEEL like you do”.

It hit me, that some people don’t get to FEEL all this. 

And I shifted. 

I felt grateful.

And I cried. 

I then decided to let it all out.  To live loud and proud in my tears.  And to share with people why I cry.  I’m sure I still look over emotional.  It might make people uncomfortable.  But at this point in my life, I don’t care. 

I still cry. 

I cry every day.  And here’s why…

I cry because this life is pure magic.

I cry out of gratitude for every breath.

I cry for beauty.

I cry at art.

I cry when I see moments of kindness.

I cry when I hear beautiful music.

I cry when I sing.

I cry when I reflect on life in the shower.

I cry when I say goodbye to a friend.

I cried eating a blueberry muffin at Starbucks once.  That was really really good. 

I cry at commercials.

I cry watching my kids sleep.

I cry when I travel.  When I fly through the air and look out the window. 

I cry when I walk into a church.

My husband jokes that I cry at mall openings.  I have never cried at a mall opening. 

But I have cried at the opening of the Olympics.  And the closing ceremonies. 

And my sons soccer game yesterday.

Basically I cry when I feel connected.  I cry when I FEEL this life.  When I feel alive. 

Unapologetically I cry.  And I look forward to the moments in my day, those vulnerable, beautiful, tear-filled moments where my heart feels so full I can hardly breath. 

When I sip air in through my nose and my eyes well up with tears.  Only to be sucked back in moments later when I compose myself.  It was a moment of sheer bliss.  A moment of REAL life.  To feel alive.  And grateful.  And connected. 

I’ve never counted how many times I’ve cried in a day.  But I might start now.  And I invite you to start with me.  Can we FEEL alive and connected 2 times, 5 times, 10 times a day?  I’m willing to try.

This is LIFE.  This is really living. 

Cry with me.